I started to do a play by play of the experience of getting married as a slave – but ultimately decided against it because i wanted to EXPERIENCE it. i wanted to be fully present and immersed without “over writing” the experience.
And now i’m ready to write.
When Master decided we would be wed – from the outset He said that the wedding would not – could not become it’s own “thing” – something that we cater to, feed and nurture. Instead the wedding would be a celebration of what IS – a delightful way to invite our friends and family to share in our joy, and a reflection of our M/s dynamic. There would be no wedding meltdowns, frantic behavior, or bridezilla like affectations. This was amazingly comforting to me. The last thing i wanted was for the wedding to undermine exactly what we were building.
Here are some of the things that Master and i did that deepened and heightened our M/s in our wedding.
*The date – We felt strongly that our wedding date should be a 9 numerologically. 9 indicates a relationship overshadowed by the Divine. It is a marriage with a purpose of Global Awakening and spiritual connection. It was very apropos to our dynamic and purpose.
* The Planning – Master directed everything. From the onset we looked at it as me being His consultant and He the client creating the wedding He desired. (Thank you kitten for putting it so succinctly!) Master chose the colors, the budget, the clothing, the guest list, invitations, food, rituals etc; my job was to gather information to present choices to Him (much as i do with my wardrobe) and He would decide. Our colors were eggplant and chartreuse. (Royalty, magic and mystery and life/growth) Our motif was peacock feathers – symbolizing Forever (immortality), Guidance, Royalty, Incorruptibility, Watchfulness, continued growth and betterment of ones self – which are all things of import to us. The peacock is also associated with Oshun – who is one of The Invisibles who sits on my Council. The Theme was “Always and All Ways” .
*The Apparel – Master chose that i would wear a white sari and 14 of the 16 adornments of the Hindu bride. Each adornment has symbolic meaning. I was also scented with Bakhoor – The traditional ritual incense used by women in Yemen. Master wore a white tunic suit that was custom made for Him. He also wore a kufi – a small cap with associated symbolism of being a patriarch.
*The venue – Master chose a Labyrinth. We were wed in the center of it. Labyrinths have huge significance to us. Master says “a persons whole life is manifest here” and so it is. As we go towards the center of the labyrinth we divest ourselves of baggage and as we leave we put on that which is needful. As i walked the candle lined path to the center of the labyrinth where my Lord stood – i felt myself letting go. Letting go of past hurts, forgiving myself and others, letting go of everything so that while ornamented and clothed i stood before Him naked – and not ashamed. As we walked out of that space after the wedding i felt i had entered into a new dimension of our relationship and Great Adventure.
*The Flowers – Master decided that i’d not have a bouquet. Instead we did the traditional exchanging of garlands found in Hindu wedding ceremonies. The exchange of garlands symbolizes “I love and accept you”
*The children – We had decided early on not to have our children in the ceremony; as the marriage is about He and i – not them. However they did do things in the wedding – handing out fans, showing people where to stand…and at the moment when our Shamanic Officiant gave me away and asked who gives this bride to this Man the children all said in unison “We all do!”
*The Circle – Master at the beginning of the wedding ceremony called the circle – This is from Native Traditions. We honored the Great Father in the sky above – the Great Mother on whom we stand- the energy of our ancestors, those who have come before us- the energy of those who are yet to be and our children and youth. The Masculine energy in it’s Building and Strength and protection. The feminine energy and its creative ability, nurturing and beauty and we honored ourselves as we stood in the center of the circle – as One.
My vows to Master were:
I stand before the All that is and this crowd of witnesses – Those who watch – friends and family that love and support us – seen and unseen.
I see You my Beloved.
Today I give to you my essence and my being, my devotion and my faith. I accept Your authority as my Lord and my Head. I give to You my absolute obedience, my adoration and love and my undying affection and acceptance of All You are.
I am Thankful to the Divine to have this opportunity to join You on the Great Adventure, to know You even as I am known by You. To stand before you – naked and not ashamed – vulnerable and willing.
May the Divine grant me wisdom and insight, may my hands be swift to accomplish Your vision, may my body stay strong and able, my I be granted length of days to walk with You as long as You travel in this Realm – and when the time comes to leave this veil of tears may I meet You on the other side. May Your desire and will be my own, Entreat me not to leave You, or to refrain from following after You: for wherever You go, I will go; and where You live I will live: Your people will be my people and Your God will be my God – may the divine deal with me be it ever so severely, if even death separates You and me.
Master’s Vows to me:
I stand here before our friends and family and I see you – And I gratefully and humbly receive all that you have entrusted to my hand And laid at my feet.
Today I give to you my heart – as you join with me on this journey and I ask that the
Divine bless us and all we put our minds and hands to do as we walk together.
I am so thankful to the Divine for all the many blessings that I have received and
this I know to be true – that the Divine loves me…for if I have no other evidence than this – that he has placed you in my life, I know that I am loved and cherished and favored above all Men.
May He grant me clarity of vision, and strength to accomplish all that He has set
before me to do, with you at my side. And may we ever grow together in love and
in our devotion to each other and may we never part from one another but be
together in love always and in all ways, Amen.
The Poem: This is a poem that was read during the ceremony that has always been so meaningful and VERY VERY True for us:
Looking for your Face – by Rumi
From the beginning of my life
I have been looking for your face
but today I have seen it.
Today I have seen
the charm, the beauty,
the unfathomable grace
of the face
that I was looking for.
Today I have found you
and those that laughed
and scorned me yesterday
are sorry that they were not looking
as I did.
I am bewildered by the magnificence
of your beauty
and wish to see you with a hundred eyes.
My heart has burned with passion
and has searched forever
for this wondrous beauty
that I now behold.
I am ashamed
to call this love human
and afraid of God
to call it divine.
Your fragrant breath
like the morning breeze
has come to the stillness of the garden
You have breathed new life into me
I have become your sunshine
and also your shadow.
My soul is screaming in ecstasy
Every fiber of my being
is in love with you
has lit a fire in my heart
and you have made radiant
the earth and sky.
My arrow of love
has arrived at the target
I am in the house of mercy
and my heart
is a place of prayer.